The Oasis Space

Transitioning From Toxic to Healthy Relationships w/Ralph & Daa'Iyah Plaskett

Patrice Grimes / Ralph & Daa'Iyah Plaskett Season 2 Episode 12

I think we've all had some unpleasant r/s experiences.  What's even MORE challenging to embrace a healthy relationship or even know the first steps to transition into one if you've  had one, or even numerous, toxic relationships in the past.  We all want healthy, reciprocal relationships, but don't quite know how to achieve it...until now :)

This episode, I'm joined by 12 year marriage vets, Ralph & Daa'Iyah Plaskett, where they share their initial dating process and the different approach both of them had to take in order to transition into a committed, healthy, and happy relationship for both of them.  We also discussed:
- Doing the Work to Show Up As Your Authentic Self
- Analyzing Historical Dating Patterns
- The Mindset Shift Required For Commitment
- Identifying You and Your Partner's Communication Style
- The Tug of War Between Triggers vs. Actuality,
- The Importance of Identifying Green Flags

Key Quotes
"I made the commitment that i was going to be open, honest and answer all of the questions regardless of where this thing [relationship] might go." - Ralph 

"I didn't send a representative during our first date.  I showed up on the first date so you know what you're dealing with." - Daa'Iyah

"Part of it [the dating process] is learning how to trust yourself again." - Patrice 

"I got to know myself which gave me the strength to be able to speak up for myself." - Daa'Iyah 

 "I was committed to making a relationship work. I was committed to working on the relationship understanding no relationship is easy or perfect or anything. But I was committed to say i'm going to put in the work."- Ralph

"It's a vulnerable position; it says I have to be willing to talk about the good, the bad, and the ugly in order to be committed towards a relationship." - Ralph

"You have to have the hard conversations.  We have the hard conversations, even when we don't feel like it." - Daa'Iyah

"You can reconcile by understanding this person is not here to harm me, they're not here to intentional hurt me so a little bit of time could help to dissect the situation." - Patrice

"You don't fight fair when you're mad." - Daa'Iyah

"We might have conversations that are tough. But those are intended for growth as a couple.  Those are intended for bettering the relationship.  Those are not intended to intentionally open wounds." - Ralph

"A lot of times in relationships, we only identify the red flags. We rarely identify the green flags. The ones that say 'Go! This is great. This is healthy. It's safe to keep proceeding. It's safe to let down the walls. It's safe to be loved by this person." - Patrice

"One of the factors of transitioning to a healthy relationship is being open and ready. Ready to receive the potential of a good relationship." - Patrice


Rapid Value Questions
What is one thing you like to do to sustain or reset your peace?
- Travel / Spending time together

Name one book or song that's helped you to define peace?
- Never Too Much by Luther Vandross 

How do you define peace for yourself now?
- Not entering situations or relationships that cause me stress or anxiety. Being secure in whatever I enter into/When I feel loved, unconditional love.

Fill In the Blank:
My name is Daa'Iyah, and without peace, I'd probably be crazy; but with peace, I have joy.
My name is Ralph, and without peace, I'd probably be wilding out; but with peace, I am centered. - Ralph

LINKS
Engage with Patrice/Inquiries/Booking
https://sociatap.com/ThePeaceCurator/

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