The Oasis Space

Daddy Issues & Disassociation To Discovery & Destiny w/ Bernadette Jackson

Patrice Grimes/Bernadette Jackson Season 2 Episode 9

Here's the facts: One in four children in America grow up in homes without a father present.  Not only is this physically damaging, but the emotional and mental effects can be so detrimental that it leads into adulthood.  Sometimes, the very thing prohibiting you from transforming conflict to peace lies in the root of fatherlessness.

In this episode, I had the pleasure of sitting down with Relationship Strategist, Bernadette Jackson, where she shared her personal story of fatherlessness and why it was crucial for her to ditch the norm of numbing the pain with disassociation to going on an extensive journey of self discovery in order to heal. We also discussed:

- Connotations Associated with "Daddy Issues"
- Disassociation From Emotions and Identifiable Signs To Know If You Suffer from Disassociation
- The Effect of Fatherlessness on Women vs. Men
- Children's Inability to Grieve Fatherlessness Due to Parental Expectations
- Similarities Between Physical vs. Emotionally Absent Fathers

Key Takeaways/Quotables

"Even the idea of trying to change what this relationship [with my father] was in my imagination has also played out in my relationships, until I decided to heal." - Bernadette Jackson

"I was tired of trying to convince people to be emotionally ready for something that they said they were or something I said I wanted." Bernadette Jackson

 "I had to take ownership of what belongs to me, and what belongs to me is my response to what has happened." - Bernadette Jackson

"I became radical about trying to understand exactly what my issues were, what was going on with me, what did my father loss mean to me, how was it presenting in. my relationships, how it was affecting me in ways I didn't know." - Bernadette Jackson

"I was committed, fully, to understanding who I was; to self discovery." - Bernadette Jackson

"We normalize conflict without still realizing even though it's "normal," this doesn't feel good to me." - Patrice Grimes

"A lot of times people will translate grief to mean someone dying in your family, without acknowledging that grief comes in different forms and its literally the psychological acknowledgement of a loss." - Patrice Grimes

Rapid Value Questions
What is one thing that you like to do to sustain or reset your peace?
- I take opportunities to really be by myself. 

Name one book or song that's helped you to define peace.
- "Peace is not something external, it's something that's within so regardless of the chaos around you, you can still be peaceful in the middle of the storm."

How do you define peace for yourself now?
- Peace for me is being authentic in the moment as well as honoring the request that I make to myself.

Fill in the Blank:
My name is Bernadette and without peace, I'd probably be bitter, but with peace, I know that I can confidently walk in my purpose and be fulfilled.

LINKS:
Engage with Patrice/Inquiries/Booking
https://sociatap.com/ThePeaceCurator/

Engage with Bernadette:
IG: @BernadetteNJackson
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